The late Wayne Dyer said, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
He was talking about a powerful sales skill; one you might be overlooking: reframing.
Straight out of the psychology world, reframing is the ability to look at a person, situation, or outcome from a different—often more productive—perspective. For sales professionals, this is a critical skill for emotional regulation, which enables calmer conversations and smarter decision-making.
Let’s look at three common sales scenarios and how reframing changes the conversation that salespeople have with themselves and others.
1. Price Objections Too Early
Every rep knows the feeling: you're two minutes into the meeting and the prospect blurts out, “What’s your price?”
This question tees up the fight-or-flight response causing many salespeople to panic. They move into defend, justify and oversell trying to prove their value.
Instead, teach your team to pause and ask:
“I wonder what else is going on here?”
This question shifts their mindset from reactivity to curiosity. With this new mindset, a salesperson will ask more questions to uncover what is really behind the “what’s your price” question. In my experience, early price questions are a sign that the prospect doesn’t really know how to buy what you're selling. Price is their only qualifying filter.
2. The Aggressive, Guarded Prospect
Some buyers feel more like interrogators than prospects. They’re tough, skeptical, and fire off question after question.
Before I learned the power of the reframe, I would get emotionally triggered and turn into an old-fashioned answering machine. No redirects or clarifying questions. Just a lot of desperate answers hoping the meeting would end early.
Avoid my mistake and encourage reps to reframe the situation by asking themselves this question:
“I wonder who burned this person?”
Many aggressive prospects are just protecting themselves after a previous experience where a rep overpromised and underdelivered. They feel foolish and betrayed so they are never going to allow that situation to happen again. This shift in thinking activates empathy which lowers the emotional temperature in the salesperson.
3. Post-Loss Coaching Conversations
Your rep just lost a deal they poured hours into. They're disappointed and discouraged.
Start with empathy—but don’t stop there. Try this reframing question:
“What’s good about this loss?”
Be ready for an eye roll and a puzzled look. Then follow with:
“Okay, what’s one or two lessons you’ll carry forward into your next call?”
This question reframes a failure into a valuable gift: a lesson learned. And this lesson will be used to make future sales meetings more effective. The salesperson will recognize that a lesson learned is the gift that keeps on giving.
The Bottom Line:
Reframing helps your team access the smart part of their brain instead of being hijacked by emotional triggers. It creates salespeople who thoughtfully respond instead of react.
Want to build a team of emotionally intelligent sellers?
Start by teaching the art—and science—of the reframe.
Good Selling and Leading!
